On January 6, Chris' dad passed away at the hospital with his wife, mother, and two children by his side. In some ways it was sudden (he was shopping at Costco less than a day before) but we knew he had chronic health issues that would limit his time on earth. The following days we went through photos and videos of Grandpa Tom which brought back fun memories. With Covid precautions in place, the funeral and all the typical events surrounding it were different. Chris wanted to write and say the eulogy, which he did while wearing his dad's rainbow bowtie. He did a great job. We know things will be very different without Grandpa Tom around, but we take comfort in knowing his pain and health issues are not burdening him anymore and he can be at peace.
Here is Chris' eulogy:
Good Afternoon, Good Evening, how are you?!?! My name is Chris Miskowiec and I am Tom’s son. As many of you know, my dad loved to use that type of greeting. His goal was to bring joy and laughter into every encounter he had and that is my goal today. My dad was an emotional person, but he would much rather have us crying tears of laughter than of sorrow. Thank you to everyone for coming to celebrate and honor my dad’s life, even in the midst of a pandemic. My family and I truly appreciate your presence today, whether in person or in spirit.
Dad, Grandpa, Tom, Tommy, Chi-Chi the uncle, Chee Chee the clown, Gliggenhead, or hey you, whatever you wanted to call him…my dad had a personality that was larger than life. He radiated happiness and humor everywhere he went and it was infectious. He was a natural entertainer from a young age relishing attention and loving bringing smiles and laughter to others. No matter where he interacted with you; on the phone, in his barber chair, on a parade route, or via a random encounter at a store or restaurant, he always wanted to leave you with a smile. I remember driving with him one day to a Smiles Unlimited Clown Ministry event at a nursing home and I kept seeing people wave and honk at us as we drove by. I asked him if he knew all those people, he said “No silly, they’re waving at me because I’m dressed like a clown”! I just assumed he knew them, because he always seemed to know someone everywhere we went. He brought a countless number of smiles to the faces of his family, friends, customers and complete strangers over his 65 years on this earth. He was the king of jokes and had an uncanny memory and ability to tell jokes, even if some were of the chuckle and roll your eyes variety. Raise your hand if my dad ever told you a joke and got you laughing (pause). I’m sure he got St. Peter smiling and laughing pretty quickly when he arrived at those pearly gates!
My dad had many roles during his life, but he played 3 of them exceptionally well…Loving Spouse, Dedicated Father, and Strong Christian. Through watching how he conducted himself in these roles, I learned so much. He impacted and taught people through those actions and all of us here today were formed at some level or another by the interactions we had with my dad. I remember when we went out to the Cheesecake Factory one year for Father’s Day (he loved the Cheesecake Factory) and just had terrible service from our waiter. I was mad and wanted to leave him a small tip, but dad said “We don’t know what he has going on in his life, he is probably just having a bad day.” and then he gave him a big tip and talked to him privately before we left. I learned about forgiveness and compassion that day from my dad, an act of a Strong Christian.
Our childhood was filled with wonderful memories of family gatherings, game nights, movie nights, Catholic mass, neighborhood walks, family dinners, swimming pools, family devotionals, scavenger hunts and playing football or basketball in the front yard. He was always available to talk with us, make us laugh, play games with us and pray with us. Attending Cursillo had an immediate impact on my dad’s life, he was on fire with a love for Christ and it started to impact the rest of our family shortly. It helped my mom Leslie, my sister Liz and myself form a deeper relationship with Christ and strengthen our Catholic faith, all led by my dad. I noticed during mass at St. Michael, where we were parishioners for many years, that my dad would always let all of us pass in front of him as we processed up to receive the Eucharist. I asked him why he did this and he said “I have to make sure my family receives Jesus before I do”. I learned about the importance of making sure my family is prepared to go to heaven from my dad, an act of a Dedicated Father.
Tom met my mom, Leslie, the love of his life, in 1980 while working at St. Vincent hospital, the same place they were to part just a week and a half ago on January 6th. They were married on May 15th, 1981 and have enjoyed almost 40 years of marriage together. Mom has been continuously by his side for the past 5 years since dad dealt with a sepsis infection and multiple joint replacements in 2016. She had a very difficult job of understanding all that was going on with my dad, talking with doctors, making tough decisions, providing the family with updates and taking care of dad when he was at home or in assisted care. Dad was thankful every day for mom and all that she did for him, he always made sure he told her how much he loved her and gave her hugs and kisses often. They were constant companions during those hard years and their marriage bond was strengthened through conversations, prayer, trips to Costco, backgammon games, episodes of Blue Bloods and just sitting quietly in each other’s presence…although often dad would nod off and start snoring! I learned how you should love your spouse in sickness and in health by watching their relationship, an act of a Loving Spouse.
Tom was blessed to have 5 grandchildren here on earth and he loved to spend time with them and always did the best that he could based on his current health situation. He helped coach basketball and worked on Cub Scout activities, like making pinewood derby cars, with Camden. He enjoyed swimming at Gulf Shores, AL, with Savannah and making root beer floats with her when she spent the night. He liked going to playgrounds and reading books with Jonas. He always wanted to hold and make his newest grandbabies, Levi and Thomas, laugh and smile. Thomas especially loved to be held and smile and laugh at his namesake grandpa. They had a special connection and Thomas would always light up and giggle when his grandpa was making his trademark funny faces and goofy sounds.
My dad loved all his children and grandchildren
very much and wanted to give them everything he had at all times, but the truth
was he was a very different person after his sepsis infection in 2016. He struggled daily with health, pain and
mobility issues for these past five years.
He was so vibrant and healthy in the years prior to 2016, but these last
five years were filled with suffering for him and he was very limited at what
he could do. He was diagnosed with liver
disease in January of 2020 and had a number of medical issues throughout this
past year, every day was a battle for him.
Thankfully God gave his immediate family one last great day together to
celebrate Christmas…Dad looked good and felt good and had a great time with his
family. He requested we take a picture
with him, mom and all the grandkids and that is the only picture we have of him
with all 5 grandkids. Now my dad gets to
leave behind all the pain and suffering he endured for years in his earthly
body and take on a perfect heavenly body.
He is probably shooting jump shots, doing cannonballs, challenging
people to pushup competitions, building things in his woodworking shop, doing
the hambone, cooking, giving haircuts, telling those silly dad jokes and loving
every minute of it. You deserve all that
happiness dad, as Jesus would say “When you made my people smile, you made me
smile. Well done my good and faithful
servant.”
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